You feel so far away now
But your loss still closes in on me
I’ll go through a day numb
Playing the charade of normality
Then I’ll open a draw
And find some of your jewellery
Or let my eyes linger
Too long on a photo
And I crumble
It’s that time of year too
Eight years ago today
I woke up next to you
For the first time
And watched you sleep
While I wrote my first
Love poem to you
We were both so full of wonder
At what we had found
How did we sink so far
To our separation
Then
Your suicide
I still loved you
You still loved me
But we had made
Such a mess of things
There seemed no way back
I didn’t know that for you
There seemed no way forward
Either
If I could go back eight years
I would tell you to run
But who knows if that
Would have saved you
And where you would
Have run too
We had some good times too
I know
I have the photographs